Flex.0

Throughout the 70s and early 80's an evil scientist was aggressively preparing a plan to speed up the inevitable self destruction of mankind. He began building Robots. The Scientist believed that Punk Rock would bring about the early extinction on mankind and that nothing could deliver Punk Rock more efficiently to the masses than a robot. He began by building two units, Marticus (M-420-SCIFI) and Riblets (R-69-DRWHO) and programmed them to play Punk Rock. The evil scientist new he had achieved partial success when he brought the two robots to life and they immediately began drinking heavily and yelling at each other. After recording several demos written by the two inebriated automatons, he unleashed the robots to the public. Within just one week of introducing the music to the city of Grand Rapids, Michigan, the crime rate had risen by 15% and and a conspicuous amount of people had stopped bathing. One day the scientist was discussing the music of his creations with a friend, Glen Danzig. He became momentarily disquieted, when the friend mentioned the music may not be widely accepted because it lacked 'soul.' He soon realized the solution was quite simple. The evil scientist promptly murdered his friend and extracted his soul. He began building two more units, Cody (C-40OZ-DENIM) and Mike (M-MRE-PEDAL). Ripping the soul into four, he built a soul chamber in each robot to ensnare a piece of Glen for all eternity. "Now you are truly immortal, my friend. Muaaahhahahaha!!!" the scientist laughed uncontrollably as he brought the final two units to life. We were built to destroy mankind with its own contrivance.