Evolution Underground

“We want to play music all year and meet cool people and make some money and not live with our parents. Anything you can do to help with those four things would be greatly appreciated. Especially the third one.”

This is us:
Darin Snowder: Lead vocals, guitar, kazoo. Has successfully tracked and captured a Sasquatch on two separate continents (yes, two!). Supposedly, has received his acceptance letter from OU, even though the school year has already started. Authenticity of letter has yet to be verified. Can maneuver a van and trailer in reverse faster than Jason Bourne in a Mini Cooper on a Parisian side street. Wins gold medals for outstanding facial hair. Once lost his cell phone 42 times in one day. Expert on Ancient Aliens.

Will Rice: Awesome and (sometimes) guitar. Has several tattoos that make him look cooler than everyone else in the band (not that it’s hard to do). Still has health insurance. Proud of the fact he looks and dresses like Bret Michaels. Voted “Most Likely To Not Fail At Life” by the other members in his band. Believes in and is afraid of “Cubicle Trolls”. Also an expert on Ancient Aliens.

Shea Ashworth: Bass. Real into sleeping. Came in second place on Nickelodeon’s Global Guts after being blinded by a glitter storm (aka snow blizzard) and hitting his opponent’s actuator at the top of the Super Aggro Crag. Still has a crush on Mo, the referee. So young he has no idea that computers, cell phones, or ipods once never existed. Has a pretty good vertical jump.

Brad Ashworth: Drums, muscle. Would rather play for the OU Sooners, Oklahoma Thunder, or Dallas Cowboys than in Evolution Underground. Good at mowing grass and laying down sod. Hates that he’s good at mowing grass and laying down sod. Near-expert level at “Sports” trivia. Fist-fought a caramel latte that “looked at him weird”. Wishes he lived in the 1980′s and was the drummer for Motley Crue, twirling the drum sticks like Tommy Lee. Instead, he’s just some poor drumming orphan.”