The Matadors

In early 1995 Joel "Hooch" Parkins started a rockabilly band with his two friends "Creepin'" Jeff Sheppard and some other guy.

They played the "Z" circuit clubs of rural Ontario for about a year with much success. Riling up the plowmen and women of tobacco country is no small feat but they seemed to hold a power over them, forcing them to drink more and more booze until the farmers were unable to tend to their fields. Many crops were lost due to the Matadors in those years. Eventually the band would be boycotted on the rural circuit. The field workers feared, and rightly so, that if the MATADORS were allowed to play in their presence again, all would be lost.

So the boys headed into London, Ontario to ply their trade in the urban pubs. The crowds were untamable and reckless in the city. The Matadors set bar revenue records every night of the week.

Dozens of Matador-esque bands would pop up and then suddenly dissolve in frustration every day. Yet somehow, it wasn't enough for the boys-- they yearned for something a little more.

One night in 1999 Parkins was approached by what he describes as "a ghoulish figure in a black hood... or something."

The mysterious stranger told Parkins that he was a representative of a group called The Lucifarian Brotherhood of Baphomet, and that The Matadors had caught the attention of the brotherhood. This "ghoul" came to propose a deal to the band. If the Matadors would write and perform Lucifarian gospel music, mixing it in with their traditional rockabilly set, they would, in exchange, receive super-human ability on their respective instruments as well as complete omnipotence over their audiences.

This sounded like a fair deal to Parkins so he pitched it to the other Matadors. They agreed that the deal was in their favour and set about to cement the deal. Instantly the audiences were in a frenzy, drinking inhuman amounts with complete disregard for tomorrow. Once the band began with the new Lucifarian music, onlookers could not help but spend their entire paychecks in a single evening of lewd wanton depravity.

As time went on, The Matadors became more and more powerful as they added more Lucifarian music to their repertoire. Eventually the performances became so intense that some members of the band became afraid of the power and evil that followed them to every show. These cowardly members were allowed out of their contract with the brotherhood and went on to record their own solo record.

It was at this time that Bob Carvell (RC) joined the band. RC was fresh from selling his soul to Lucifer in return for two things: incredible foosball prowess and masterful drumming abilities. This "crossroads" deal made Bob the perfect addition, making The Matadors the trinity of evil it is today.

Hooch, who by this point possessed the power to play his guitar from across the room, using only the power of his mind, took over on vocals. "Creepin''" Jeff Sheppard, whose unmatched doghouse bass prowess has led many a listener to believe he was listening to the son of the devil, had now become the world's most feared upright bass player.

The Matadors now travel all over the world spreading the "infernal word" to the masses and harvesting souls for Lucifer. They will be in your town next. When you come to see The Matadors (and you will), come prepared to drink more alcohol than you've ever drank in your life. Also, bring a change of pants because in the excitement of the show, you WILL shit the pants that you wore to the show.